Our pint-sized world...

17 Weeks

2010-09-19T23:27:00.000-04:00

Gestational age:  17 weeks!!

Baby's current size:  Approximately 5 in.

Similar in size to:   An onion (except all the onions we get are never that big!)

Weight gain:  Not sure. I don't own a scale, and don't plan on it, but my clothes are still fitting the same as before - except with a bigger belly :)

Looking forward to:  Finding out the sex of the baby!! So eager to know if the baby is a boy or a girl (I'm secretly rooting for another girl!)

Not looking forward to:  Still frettin' about that GD test. Needlessly.

Biggest food craving:  Grape juice and Cranberry Limeades from Sonic. That's about it.

Biggest food aversion:  Eggs and corn tortillas. Even worse, eggs on a corn tortilla.

How this pregnancy compares to the others:  Definite back pain now, but still worlds better than the others. Still the best pregnancy to date!

Nervous about:  Gaining tons of weight like I always do. Definitely keeping a tight reign on the munching this time around!

Fall Luv Blog Party!

2010-09-11T15:18:00.001-04:00

I love blog parties. I love fall. The two make me a very happy woman, as well as having the insatiable desire to make mulled cider, a big pot of chili, don my favorite sweater, etc.

Speaking of favorites, here's all I need for a perfect fall!

The Blue Ridge Parkway, in all of its autumnal glory

Our favorite apple orchard, and their Apple Butter Festival

Coffee (but when is it ever out of season?)

Anything sweaterish

Hosting and enjoying Thanksgiving with our dear family

Marching band competitions!

These things don't even scratch the surface! Around here, summer is definitely not busy - it's fall that's the busiest. And oh, how I love it! For more Fall Luv, check out The Patriotic Peacock - and get in on the fun :)

14 Weeks

2010-08-30T12:44:00.000-04:00

Gestational age:  14.5 weeks :)

Baby's current size:  3.4 inches, CRL

Similar in size to:  A super-cute lemon! (see above)

Weight gain:  Another half pound, putting me at my pre-pregnancy weight. Not bad for 3.5 months along! I'm in all maternity pants now :)

Looking forward to:  That 20 wk ultrasound! Can't wait to find out what this darling little one is!

Not looking forward to:  Still frettin' about that glucose test. One of these days, I'll actually look it up and find out.

Biggest food craving:  Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers from Wendy's (hold the bun and mayo, please). YUM! I also truly enjoy grape juice. I love a nice, big glass with ice in it :)

Biggest food aversion:  Still yucky on eggs, and particular about cheese.

How this pregnancy compares to the others: My back is starting to give me problems, but it's okay if I baby it. Still the best pregnancy yet! What a pleasant surprise!

Nervous about: Procuring the desired larger vehicle BEFORE baby's arrival. However, the Lord will provide for our growing family. Even if it means traveling in two separate cars for awhile! We know the vehicle type and specs, just looking for the right one for the right price. I sure would like to know how to drive that big thing before the babe is here as well. (As a side note, if you're selling an Excursion with a third bench row, please leave a comment... :D)

Four Moms Open House: Master Bedroom

2010-08-26T18:02:00.000-04:00

Since I love the blogging project of Four Moms, 35 Kids, I wanted to join in on the Open House fun (a few weeks late).

So here is our Master Bedroom, in all it's glory :) Normally, we put sheets on our beds. However, I am blogging and the sheets are still sitting there. The dresser on the right is where I keep Emmie's cloth diapers, as well as where the new baby will be keeping his/her clothes. There is also a small end table on the left side, but it's not really visible because of the shadow.

This is the view from the closet (which is the big dark thing on the left of the above pic). Yes, those are blackout curtains, and I love them dearly :)

Please note that this is as close as you will get to the inside of my closet. Semi organized, yet stressful all at the same time. AND an empty hamper (for all the clothes in the hall!) :)

And, looking at the dresser and mirror from the closet. This furniture belonged to my grandparents, and it means a great deal to me. The angel picture on the bookshelf belonged to my other grandmother (my father's mother). It hung over her bed, and she told my aunt that the picture reminded her of me. My aunt gave it to me in July; I think of her every time I see it. It will be on the wall soon. As for the TV and the blue table, those also belonged my grandparents (the same ones that owned the furniture). We don't watch it, and it's taking up useless space. I'll take it downstairs eventually. The dresser holds Shawn and I's clothing.

Well, there ya go :) Our bedroom is teeny tiny, but cozy. I love our room and the simplicity of it. For more pictures of Master Bedrooms in the Open House, check here. Hope you enjoyed a taste of our home :)

Gentleness of Voice

2010-08-15T14:33:00.000-04:00

Please take moment to read this humble poem on tone of voice. It truly is my heart's desire to be loving in every way, my tone included. Good words are not enough. In order to convey one's words clearly and effectively, one's tone must be gentle and full of love. What a neglected concept this is! But what a necessary virtue, which so honors the Lord and clothes His children with beauty. What a noble thing it is to be self-controlled and gentle, loving in all ways. Lord, change my heart to be more like You!!!! Work in me this gentleness and joy, that You may be glorified in this home and that the children will see You in me!

Oh the Fluff!

2010-08-13T12:06:00.000-04:00

Today I ordered four new diaper covers. Typically, I use prefolds or fitteds with a cover for Em. I have a few Thirsties covers that are a bit large for her (in gender neutral colors). I also have two Bummis covers (also gender neutral), and my wool. The wool covers are great, but real care-intensive. They have been my favorite so far.

Flash back to last summer. I let my sister-in-law borrow all of my girly cloth diaper supplies - covers, fitteds, all-in-ones, and pockets. I saw no time in the next few years that I would be using them again! It appears that B has gotten a good bit of use from them, which thrills my heart! My heart is missing the girly fluff though :)

So this morning I went to the Swaddlebees website (one of my personal favorites!). Swaddlebees has an AWESOME clearance/seconds page, and I have gotten some great deals over the years. Today was no different. I bought four diaper covers for $5 ea. All told, I spent $25 (including shipping) on products that normally retail for $86 (including shipping). Now THAT is wonderful!!! I could not make my own for that price!

Three of the covers are minky (which is SO SOFT!!!), and one is a standard fleece cover. The picture above is similar to one that I purchased :D

So if your'e wanting to add to your stash or take the plunge and get started with cloth diapering, they are a great place to start!

Pampers DryMax and Cloth Diapering

2010-08-10T15:26:00.000-04:00

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a very... um... "invested" person. I'm either totally, 100%, wholeheartedly into something, or the opposite is true. I am finicky about everything. I hate this about myself.

I say this because I want you to know this is not a post about how everyone should cloth diaper. I used to feel that way. Then the weight of the task of cloth diapering several children at once, along with underlying health problems, fell on me. I could handle it for a few days, then I was back to sposies, trying desperately to catch up on everything else. It was a bad cycle to be in, but I had to come to the decision that, while cloth diapering is ideal, I had to do what was best for my family (and my workload!). When I felt up to it, I'd go back at it. But every time it became a burden instead of a help, it went out the door.

Things are different now; I am healthy. I'm not suffering from chronic fatigue or depression, nor does my back give me problems. I don't have severe joint pain, nor constant migraines. My laundry has been manageable for quite a long time, and I can definitely add in an extra load every few days. I love this. All of this!!!!

But, as C.J. Mahaney says, let's "keep the main thing the main thing." This whole Pampers Dry Max thing. Seems as if lots of babies are getting chemical burns and bad rashes from this diaper since Pampers has changed the chemicals in it. And Pampers is basically saying it's not legit. Hmm. It really points out some things that have ALWAYS concerned me about disposables. Remember, I'm not against them (see above). But they concern me. And here's why:

1. A potential link to asthma

2. Unnecessary chemical exposure (here, here, and here)

3. Expensive, even with coupons (See how my friend saved money with cloth diapers!)

4. How long they take to decompose

5. Several of my children have been sensitive to different brands of disposable diapers. That alone is concerning, since nothing touch a baby's bottom should be harsh enough to cause a reaction. Nothing.

Anywho. All that to say, I think we mothers should think twice about what we use on our children. Again, I'm not anti-disposable, but don't be naive enough to think that Proctor & Gamble (and the other big-name companies making other diapers) actually have your (and my!) baby's best interest in mind. Just like the carcinogens found baby wash (which, mind you, has not changed!!!), money to them is more important than safety. Be well informed. Make good decisions for your family. Don't let catchy commercials on TV blind you from some legitimate questions that are not addressed by these companies.

And, may I urge you, to consider cloth diapering? This is not a high horse for me, but a wonderful thing to consider. Check out all of the benefits, the cute diapers, and how money can be saved. Here is a cost calculator to play with. Know that with a little bit of know-how with a sewing machine or knitting needles (or even a crochet hook), it can become a lot of fun too!

11 Weeks

2010-08-05T21:12:00.001-04:00

Gestational age:  11 weeks on the day

Baby's current size:  A little over an inch and a half!

Similar in size to:   A fig (see above)

Weight gain:  Half of a pound. Oh yeah. Still in regular clothes, but thankful. Usually I have gained about 10 lbs by now!

Looking forward to:  The end of the first trimester, to put my mind at ease a bit more

Not looking forward to:  Wondering if the gestational diabetes test has gluten in it?

Biggest food craving:  This week, it's been Nut Thins crackers with cheddar cheese. Oh my goodness. I love it so much that I greatly anticipate my next snack/meal. It's kinda sad.

Biggest food aversion:  Chicken, smelly foods, and of course eggs.

How this pregnancy compares to the others:  Still no back pain, WAY less weight gain, and no depression so far. Yay! Still shaping up to be the best one yet :D

Nervous about:  Well, I am running out of cheese and crackers. This, contrary to popular thought, is indeed a dilemma. It is not unheard of for me, in my pregnant state, to shed a few tears over a food craving. The emotion just gets to be too much sometimes.

I've Come to Realize...

2010-08-05T09:26:00.000-04:00

...that I started out as an Ezzo parent, and have ended up a Sears parent. But shhhhh, don't tell anyone! :)

Mothers, We Ought to Educate Ourselves

2010-07-26T15:44:00.001-04:00

"A mother who wishes to fulfill her duties to her children should take special pains to educate herself for those momentous functions. She should read to store her mind with knowledge. She should reflect, observe, and gain useful information from every quarter. Her princeiples should be fixed, her plans laid, and her purposes formed. She must cultivate all the habits and tempers which will fit her to teach and to govern. She must seek to acquire thoughtfulness, careful vigilance, quick observation and discretion in various forms. Habits of activity, dispatch, order, and regularity are indispensable for her; so is the exercise of all the good and benevolent feelings. She must unite gentleness with firmness and attain patience and the entire command of her temper. It is of immense importance also that she should have a correct knowledge of human nature and of the way of dealing with the human heart. And, above all things, let her remember that piety is the vivifying spirit of all excellence, and example the most powerful means to enforce it. She should never let the recollection be absent from her mind that children have both eyes and ears for attention to a mother's conduct. Not content with preparing herself for her important functions beforehand, she should carry on the education of herself simultaneously with that of her children. There are few situations which more imperatively which require preparation, and yet few that receive less."

John Angell James, "For Mothers, Experienced or New"

Our Buddy Turned 4!!!

2010-07-25T21:32:00.000-04:00

Calvin's birthday party was a blast! My aunt and grandfather travelled down from West Virginia just to be here for this special day. It was a blessing, for sure!

I don't have too many pics from the party (a lot of him and the other little ones before it started), but thankfully my awesome sister took a good bit herself. Between the two of us, I think we have the whole thing covered!

Calvin is such a tenderhearted guy. He loves to play with his littlest sister! They chase each other and play peek-a-boo constantly. He takes the trash out for me, and is my go-to man for heavy lifting (you wouldn't believe his strength) and errands to the basement (when Daddy's not here). He is also Daddy's helper. This kid is amazing. He knows how to take off doorknobs with a screwdriver and can identify most every tool in our tool magazines. He loves engines, especially tractor engines. He is obsessed with all things John Deere and Troy-Built. He LOVES construction, the Newsboys, DCI; he tolerates sports. He dabbles in reading, but is more interested in disassembling whatever he gets his hands on. His favorite thing to do in the world is mow the grass with Dad. He loves to talk about the Apostle Paul, especially when he was stranded on the island of Malta for the winter. He reminds me constantly of the Gospel, and how God IS the Gospel. I love that kid.

Sometimes I feel bad for him, that he's the only guy all day long with all these girls! But then I remind myself that God's orchestration of our family is what's best - for Calvin and for us. When the drama gets too much for him, he hangs out on his bed "mowing" his pillow with his die-cast John Deere tractor. He's a quiet kid. But ALWAYS lavishes affection on me!

I am so very thankful to God for my big guy. He's just like his daddy in every way - and oh how I love them both!!!! Shawn prays every night with Calvin, asking that God will give him a heart like David's - brave and courageous, yet full of love and devotion to Him. Oh, that the Lord will hold Calvin's heart to His and make him in to a man that will honor Christ all his days!!! Amen!

Our little Gummy Bear (and current stats)

2010-07-19T16:53:00.001-04:00

I saw this on another blog, and thought it was cute! (Although, I edited the questions to personalize it more...)

Gestational age: 8w4d

Baby's current size: 1.96 cm, crown-to-rump (CRL)

Similar in size to: A kidney bean!

Weight gain: I have actually lost weight from being sick. I was in some maternity pants for awhile, now I'm back into my regular clothes - and they are getting big on me!

Looking forward to: Week 13! (And a baby belly!) And finding out the sex!!

Not looking forward to: The gestational diabetes test - always a yucky experience

Biggest food craving: Fruit

Biggest food aversion: Almost everything!

How this pregnancy compares to the others: Next to no back pain, more food aversions, less insomnia, and no gluten this time!! Oh, and less weight gain.

Nervous about: Nothing really. I feel like I've got it down by now!! Except for throwing up. I really don't want to throw up.

Picture Update

2010-07-09T13:12:00.000-04:00

Easter 2010

Shawn's Graduation! (He carried Em across the stage with him)

Our sweet Charity turned 5 in May! She is a constant blessing to us!

Lots of summer fun!

...and summer sweetness!

Lavender in bloom

Sweet, sweet Lottie!

Father's Day 2010

Short Health Update

2010-07-07T10:53:00.000-04:00

Just a quick update for those of you who may be curious. All of the various health problems I had been experiencing were resolved this past April. My Nurse Practitioner put me on a high quality multivitamin, as well as an adjusted dose of progesterone. I was also able to stop taking DHEA, which was a big step for my body. The months of quiet on our blog were filled here with activity that I had previously not been able to do. We began our homeschooling, I purged the house, reorganized most every room, weeded through old clothing (and many other accumulated items), have gone on several trips, had fun family outings, and for the first time I have been able to maintain a neat and tidy home for months on end. I feel great. And so far, this pregnancy is the best one I have had yet. I am so thankful for that phase of life to be over! But I will never take good health for granted ever again.

And last, but noteworthy, George is gone. Let's just say he got real fed up with the kids. And we said, "Back to the breeder you go." We are so not a dog family. And that was a good thing for my health.

I'll be posting some recent pictures of our little ones later on today or tomorrow!

Coming in February...

2010-07-06T22:05:00.000-04:00

And we can hardly wait to meet this new little love!!!

Introducing: King George IV

2010-03-12T14:02:00.000-05:00

Can't believe that today makes one month since we got our sweet pups. It's been a fun four weeks so far, and everyone seems to be adjusting so well to G, and likewise with G towards the children. He's such a good dog!

It simply amazes me that an animal can mean so much. My health has taken a step backwards recently, and he has been so good for that. A dog so loyal and even-tempered - he has been such a good dose of lightheartedness in this home. Very therapeutic for the depression that has constantly been my foe, and a most excellent companion.

We have been told over and over that a puppy is like a newborn - or worse. Thankfully, that's not been the case with G. When we purchased him, he was 5 months old and crate trained - so perhaps that has made all the difference in the world. However, he's not mischevious, isn't a destroyer, and hasn't even tried to counter surf yet. And talk about a couch potato!

G is an English Mastiff - a massive breed in a class of it's own (so to speak). English Mastiffs are characterized by their dignity, calmness, devotion, companionship, and protection. Chances are, this will be the only breed we will ever own. Not because we are breed snobs - but because we are smitten by him, and how he exemplifies the finest qualities of this breed.

Mastiffs are not for everyone, but if you are considering a dog, you may want to look into this breed. We are hooked!

(Click here for a short, very educational video on the breed and its history! Fascinating!)

Health Update

2010-02-01T15:52:00.000-05:00

I am finally getting around to an update! It has been quite a busy 6 days around here. I had my appointment this past Tuesday, to discuss my lab work and treatment plan.

We are so thankful that I came back negative for thyroid problems. I very much thought that may be the source of all of these issues. But seriously, who wants a syndrome or disease? We are very, very pleased that the Lord decided, in His grace, not to have us go down that path.

So what IS wrong? In short, I am deficient in quite a few major hormones, and low in one other. Progesterone, testosterone, estrogen, and DHEA are the main players here. Also, the iron stores in my liver are incredibly low. Why? Only the Lord knows. Women can have hormonal problems at any age.

So what's the good news? Well, first, it seems that through the rest and lifestyle changes implemented in the past month, I've been able to overcome the Adrenal Fatigue. Amazing, huh? My cortisol levels were normal, and it's just amazing how the Lord literally took that off of our plate. Second, the treatment for hormonal deficiencies is relatively simple. Take a few supplements, eat foods that provide what your body needs to produce these hormones. Oh, and I have to eat tons of protein (yuck).

We are so thankful for a relatively calm beginning of the end to all of this. It is quite amazing how badly a hormonal imbalance can affect a person. I have started feeling better one day at a time, and haven't needed ANY help while Shawn is at work! I am thankful EVERY DAY now for all the things I took for granted before. I so missed doing all of the wifely and motherly things that so consumed my time.

I loved my life before. Now it's better than I every could have imagined. We do not deserve a mercy like this, and so many other people must travel down that difficult road of sickness and infirmity without the relief of physical symptoms that I have been given. I am so blessed and thankful to be able to, slowly but surely, begin to regain my health and strength. The Lord is good. And He would have been JUST as good if the diagnosis would have been worse. For some reason though, He relented. And for that I am so very thankful.

There is so much to be learned during times of physical and mental pain. I have had many days in the past few months where I've been too depressed to get out of bed, had such horrible pain that I could not sleep, and had constant headaches and migraines that would hang on for days and days. Those three things alone exhausted my body and left me sobbing constantly. The grief of my last miscarriage, the loneliness of being confined to the walls of my home, and the inability to remember things, carry a thought, or effectively understand books, literally left my nerves raw and undone. I have prayed more in the past few months than probably in the past few years combined.

I know what it's like to be physically unable to do my devotions. I know what it's like to sleep for 15 hours a day for a week, and then spend the next week literally without any physical rest at all. I know the pain of not being able to trust a single emotion and literally having to leave every decision up to Shawn. I could not handle even picking out my own dinner without sobbing. He showed me such tender love and empathy, such care, such concern. I know the fear of seeing my body seem to deteriorate. I looked sick. There is no question that I was - and still am to a smaller degree.

And above all, I KNOW that our God is walking us through this valley with His arms wrapped tightly around us. He is there carrying me when I can not carry myself. He nurtured my soul, and taught my heart, when the only verses I could wrap my mind around were Psalm 23 and James 1. He did a work in our family and in our marriage that is beyond what ever could be accomplished on our own. My God is a good God. And as trivial as our trial was and is compared to the rest of the world, compared to those suffering from terminal illness, compared to those without jobs, compared to those who do not have the Lord... it still has brought us nearer to Him, nearer to the cross, and in sweeter intimacy with each other.

I am thankful for what has happened, because I see my sweet Lord in every single part, and I know He does all things for His glory. He is good. And we are so very thankful for a good start to recovery. I don't deserve it. But thanks be to God, He has given it!!

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." James 1:17

Knitting, Crocheting, and all that fun stuff...

2010-01-22T16:09:00.000-05:00

Feel free to visit my other blog, Threaded Goodness, where I rave about all things having to do with yarn, needles, hooks, and patterns. If anything, for the beautiful children donning my work. (Can't help it, I'm ridiculously smitten by the little angels!)

Help for Haiti

2010-01-14T18:25:00.000-05:00

Check out Baptist Haiti Mission - a worthwhile place to send your donation money for relief efforts. And, or course, the Red Cross. A local charity is taking supply donations at two grocery stores tonight here in town, and we are contributing to that one, and it was exciting to get my older two girls involved in it.

I explained as best as I could the situation to Charity and Lottie, how Haiti had just suffered a big earthquake, and how the people are poor. That they need food and clothes. That we need to show them Christ's love by giving them what we have to help meet their needs. And the girls understood. Charity has taken it to heart. Her mission this afternoon was to find things to give to them.

Of course, there's a list to stick to. And all the products must be new. But all of that CVS-ing has come in handy!

Please get involved. Donate. Give what you have. Thousands are suffering, children have been left orphaned, parents childless, babies suffering, many are grieving, homeless, hungry, thirsty, fatigued, and injured. But most importantly, pray for their souls. And I encourage you to send the bulk of your donation money to Christian organizations, who are not only concerned with the physical needs of the people, but also their souls. They are not only giving food and water, but giving these people the Bread of Life! Pray for the missionaries, for the people of Haiti, and that many souls would be saved!

God is good, and praise Him, He will be glorified.

"Whoever gives to the poor will not want,
but he who hides his eyes will get many a curse."
Proverbs 28:27

"Noble Mothers in Sacred Homes"

2010-01-08T15:02:00.000-05:00

Please visit "A Wise Woman Builds Her Home ", and read her encouraging post on motherhood. I hope you are as blessed as I was!

Thinking of Spring and a Health Update

2010-01-06T14:44:00.001-05:00

This is what I've been thinking about for the past few weeks. Perhaps by spring, I will be feeling well enought to handle a nice, large garden. I always start out every spring with high and lofty goals of gardening. I spend the money, get it going, but my health has always gotten in the way of being able to care for it like I should.

Well, this year, Shawn's into it as well. Lord willing, my test results will be back by my appointment at the end of the month. Lord willing, we will develop a treatment plan at that appointment.

And, Lord willing, I will be able to work a garden. At least, part time. Shawn is totally into working it, and with the job he has, it would be completely workable.

Did I mention he quit Sears? Yes, to ease the stress load on me. So one job for now, thank the Lord!!

I'll finish this random post by giving a health update on the Adrenal Fatigue front. Had a very delightful New Years, where we celebrated a late Christmas with Shawn's family. Good day, health-wise. Monday, though, I had to get labwork done, which required 12 hrs of fasting. Being that my blood sugar is wretchedly messed up, I was sick - so so so sick!! I still haven't been able to get it under control, and it's Wednesday! Anyway, yesterday and today I have been in horrible, horrible pain. My OTC pain meds put so much stress on my adrenal glands that it causes me to be in more pain, it doesn't take it away. Weird, huh? So the past two days, I've been in pain from head to toe (joints AND muscles, it feels like), my hair's been falling out more, a wierd skin rash, near passing out when I stand up (yeah, that's gotten old real quick), memory loss, headaches, the same fatigue, and my feet and legs have been swelling some. So there's your update. I am praying that another good day would come soon! And if not, that I can been content with what the Lord has for me, at ALL times!! (On a side note, I STILL cannot believe I was embarassed to tell anyone about this - and beat myself up about it - for SO LONG. Amazing.) Please, keep praying for us if you think of it!

Resolution...

2010-01-01T21:32:00.000-05:00

...to love.

"Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us."

1 John 4:7-12

Now, that's what I want for this New Year.

Have a Blessed New Year!

2010-01-01T10:15:00.000-05:00

From all six of us, have a blessed and God-honoring New Year!

Waiting on these...

2009-12-26T14:38:00.005-05:00

...to arrive on the 29th. The last two are required reading by my NP. The first, well, I HAD to get free shipping!!!

Merry Christmas

2009-12-26T14:06:00.004-05:00

We hope that your Christmas was glorious, in worship to our Lord, and thankfulness for all that His birth means for us and the world.

I deeply love Luke's rendering of the birth of Christ. But as mother, I connect with Mary's Magnificat in a personal way. Maybe it's because for past few years, I have had a young baby at Christmas. Last year, it became even more personal, since Emmie was a mere 6 weeks old at Christmas. Regardless, I am drawn to this passage year by year, as I think of what a wonder it is to be carrying a baby in the womb. But oh, not only that! Can you imagine the wonder of the baby in your womb being the Messiah??
.

Mary's Magnificat (Luke 1:46-55)

And Mary said:

My soul exalts the Lord, and my spirit has rejoiced in God my Savior.

For He has had regard for the humble state of His bondslave;

For behold, from this time on all generations will count me blessed.

For the Mighty One has done great things for me;

And holy is His name.

And His mercy is upon generation after generation toward those who fear Him.

He has done mighty deeds with His arm;

He has scattered those who were proud in the thoughts of their heart.

He has brought down rulers from their thrones, and has exalted those who were humble.

He has filled the hungry with good things;

And sent away the rich empty-handed.

He has given help to Israel His servant, in remembrance of His mercy,

As He spoke to our fathers, to Abraham and his descendants forever.

I pray that your new year is blessed!

An Update (Has it been awhile or what?!)

2009-12-22T22:56:00.005-05:00

Oh, has it been awhile.

Awhile for everything.

Remember all of that Celiac stuff? Well, still holding up on that front. Remember all of the sympoms I was experiencing? Migraines/headaches, joint pain, female problems, extreme fatigue, depression, general malaise, GI issues? Now, subtract the last one. All of the above have returned. It was a slow return. I was free of all of them for a short while (after going gluten free), but slowly it all has returned. Fast-forward to last month. Last month I had an early miscarriage (this was my second miscarriage, by the way). And... everything began to fall apart. Now I'm shaking when stressed, crying all of the time, cold constantly, not hungry, sleepy, weak, can't hold the children, can't think straight, forgetting how to do simple things, trouble reading, and the list goes on. And on. And on.

Please, don't get me wrong. Gluten free is a must around here. Three of the four children are highly sensitive, Shawn gets migraines when he eats it, and I have a horrid digestive response. But it seems as if that was a small part of the problem.

So Friday, we travelled to Waynesboro, to see an NP. After doing some research on my own, it looked like Adrenal Fatigue was a viable option. Well, it was. She diagnosed me with it after a physical, a pupil dilation test, scratching my abdomen (no better way to describe it!), and listening to my symptoms. I'm having bloodwork and a saliva test done to also test for how little cortisol my body is producing, but also vitamin deficiencies, hormone levels, thyroid levels, etc., etc. The list is extensive. But her theory is this (in addition to the Adrenal Fatigue diagnosis): I'm progesterone deficient, and probable hypothyroidism.

It fits. I look back, and it fits. Here I am thinking gluten is he main enemy, and really, we were missing the forest for the trees.

Our family history of thyroid problems is abundant. And when looking at the symptoms, I have well over 90% of them. But, time will tell.

I have an appointment at the end of January to discuss lab results and a treatment plan. Until then, rest. Rest, rest, rest. It's a good thing, since that's all I can do.

All those months and years of beating myself up over laziness, ignoring the worsening depression, not caring for my body through four back-to-back pregnancies, shunning rest, working till I dropped... and then dogging on myself more because I couldn't pull off magical birthday parties. I couldn't make it to church. I couldn't wake up early to do my devotions. I couldn't _______ (fill in the blank).

Ladies, don't compare yourself to others.

I have been in a downward health spiral for four solid years. The Lord ordains it all, I am confident that He directed my steps the entire way. I am confident that this is all for His glory and my good. But....

Don't compare yourself to others.

All of those days that I spent wondering why I couldn't keep it together, why I couldn't beat my body into submission, why I had such I hard time with this or that. Those days should have been spent resting in Him.

He has brought me to the point to where I must rest in Him. He has taken my idolatrous dreams of being the perfect mother and housewife, and He has shown me that my strength comes from Him alone. He is what my heart craves and desires and NEEDS. Him alone. And I love Him for it!

Please don't misunderstand me. These health problems of mine aren't the end of the world. I know that MANY have had it much worse than I ever will.

But our pint-sized world... it has been rocked. And He is teaching me day by day, having not the strength to even feed my own children, to rely on Him.

I hope to become a more frequent blogger than before. Perhaps next time I'll be able to give more detail. But please pray for us, if you think of it. We surely do covet it. But most of all, please pray for my parents, my sister, and my in-laws. They are working together so well to make sure I have someone with me all day every day, that I get the rest I need until I start my treatment plan, and allowing for Shawn to go to work and the kids to be cared for. They will never understand how much their love, help, and encouragement means to the six of us.

Check this out...

2009-09-11T11:30:00.002-04:00

Running a household with Celiac

2009-09-09T00:11:00.002-04:00

Yeah, yeah... I know I was going to start this HUGE endeavor to find out all of the details on disposable diapers... As usual, I bit off way more than I can chew (surprised?). After a summer of sickness, serious re-prioritizing needed to be done. A serious lesson in keeping "first things first".

So how do you run a household when illness seems to be lurking around every corner? For me, my illness comes in three forms: a reaction from ingesting gluten, migraines, and sinus infections. Sprinkle in a little chronic fatigue, and it's enough to throw the most organized momma for a loop! So what's a girl to do?! Here's my tried and (mostly) proven method:

1. Pray for grace! Know that the Lord will give it at JUST the right time - and it may not be in the form of a clean home. Perhaps your grace for the day is just teaching and loving the little souls in the house.

2. Don't push past your body's limits. When it says slow down, listen. If you don't, you aren't only exhausting yourself, but you'll find yourself letting discipline slip and getting irritable with the children. Take it easy! And pray for grace to do so.

3. Lose the "why me?" attitude. Be thankful for what God has placed in your lap that day, and treat every little annoyance and irritation as a messenger straight from Him, to help you in the school of Faith, Hope, and/or Love.

4. Ask for help. Talk about a blow to your pride! I cringe every time that I have to do so. But when I'm ill, I need it. In our home, with Shawn working two jobs, it's not feasible to ask him for help - he's exhausted trying to provide for us. So I look to my mom, or sister, or mother-in-law for it. I also have a sweet mother's helper that comes when needed.

5. Keep the meals simple. Yes, children can survive off of the occasional can of beans. So keep your pantry stocked with easy meals to save time in the kitchen if you're feeling especially ill. There have been many days where I am too ill to do more than that. Keep it simple and nutritious. Also, paper plates, cups, and plastic ware are good to have on hand for those times as well.

6. Sleep as much as possible. Utilize nap times and bedtime to your advantage. It will help tremendously, believe me.

7. Keep Scripture in front of you at all times!!! Perhaps writing verses on spiral bound index cards, listening to sermons, keeping a Bible in every room - whatever you must do, keep your mind on the Lord and not on yourself. Yes, this is the last point, but most certainly not in importance!

I hope this is an encouragement to someone, but also a peek into our life when I'm down for the count. In my next post, I hope to go over some ways to prepare for times of being ill - things I have learned the hard way and by suggestion from my family. Be blessed!

What are disposable diapers made of? (Part 1)

2009-05-01T12:37:00.002-04:00

Good question, I'd say! After googling this several times in the past, I am no closer to the answers than I was before. After reading this (yet again), I am still alarmed by that fact. What we do know is this: most disposable diapers contain chlorine (which produces dioxin), and a few other nasty things that I can't remember. So I am doing some research. First, I will be emailing one diaper company per week (I would call, but emails are MUCH easier to document for a blog!!!), and asking for full disclosure of the ingredients their diapers contain. Then, provided I get that far, will research the ingredients and report the safety of these ingredients. I will only be focusing on the Big 3 - Huggies, Pampers, and Luvs

I would love some input on this. Do you have any specific questions on disposable diapers? Any thing YOU would ask the manufacturers?

Here's hoping for answers - and good ones at that!

Easter (Yeah, I know it's late.....)

2009-04-30T08:44:00.023-04:00

Easter was such a blessing this year! I had prayed that the Lord would give us this Sunday with everyone healthy and well, so we could worship together. And he did!!

Church was awesome (I mean, I am not surprised there!), and afterward my family and Shawn's parents joined us for an Easter egg hunt, cookout, and fabulous game of kickball (which really was hysterical!).

Here are some pics from that special day!

It really was a great day. This year we made so much more of a direct effort to teach our little ones about Easter. I pray it made its way into their minds, and one day - their hearts. Never have I felt more inadequate to teach my children than when it's about the Lord! After seeing my own meager and weak efforts at this, I am even more grounded in this - salvation is of the Lord!!! Since he is the changer of hearts, I know he is able to use my flawed and clumsy words and actions for his glory and the betterment of my wee ones' souls. So thankful that HE is the one who saves!! Amen!

Back to work!

2009-04-13T09:45:00.003-04:00

Check out Threaded Goodness - I'm now taking custom orders again. Shoot me an email (threaded.goodness@gmail.com) or leave a blog comment if you want more info, or want to place an order. Sooo glad to get back to this!

7 Quick Takes Friday

2009-04-10T23:54:00.003-04:00

I am amazingly exhausted right now, so I'll make this quick!

1. I'm having coffee tomorrow morning with a dear friend, and I can hardly wait!

2. I baked my first loaf of gluten-free bread tonight, and it totally flopped.

3. I love Easter!

4. Shawn and I had an amazing day today - a whole day to ourselves while Mom watched the kids! I was able to jump start spring cleaning, and we knocked out tons of errands. That was such a huge blessing!

5. Wondering how a gluten-free Easter dinner is going to work...

6. I am really hoping that Lottie does okay this weekend with teething so that I can make it to church. I really miss being able to go that often, what with sickness, teething, etc. I have learned that mothering young children (especially 4 young children!!!) really keeps you tied to the house. I love being a mommy so much! However, you really don't understand the care that they need until you are in that position.

7. I really want to get involved at Redeemer, and occasionally I feel discouraged by #6. I wonder when I'll ever be at church consistently, and the fear of man sets in something fierce at times. But I am learning, day by day, not to worry about what others think, and attend to my primary calling - which is caring for my family to the best of my ability, with the strength that God provides. At times, though, I do feel lonely. But only sometimes :)

Happy weekend!

Look!!!

2009-04-06T11:19:00.010-04:00

Shawn decided to put up new shutters this weekend instead of painting (we just could NOT get up the gumption to tackle that room on such a gorgeous day!). It totally improved the face of our home. Here are the before photos, taken when we moved in March 2007:

Shawn graciously spent Sunday and this morning finishing it up. What a sweetheart!
I just love my handyman!! :)

Love Saturdays!

2009-04-04T15:38:00.003-04:00

This is me, unswollen and dehived - basically, normal. We were on the way to the Community Market today, and believe me - totally worth it.

I'm at my parents now, we're about to head home with the kids so I can fix dinner, Shawn can mow, and we can have fun watching the Final Four tonight (with our new wine from Chateau Z! yay!).

Tomorrow, there'll be church, dinner with family at our place (and I'm fixing up some bison that I bought at the market). Totally local, totally hormone free, and totally awesome. I can't WAIT! I love food.

And we'll paint our bedroom tomorrow. I love weekends with my fun family!!

7 Quick Takes Friday

2009-04-03T20:27:00.003-04:00

My new Friday thing. Bear with me, and be sure to check out the interesting blog above. Neat stuff.

1. I am sitting here, watching Bill O'Reilly, and missing my husband, who will not be home until 9:20 or so. So, I am slacking on putting the baby down, just because I like the company :)

2. I am hoping Shawn can land his 2nd job soon. So many people are without jobs right now, and I am so thankful for the one that he has. Still, we need to make ends meet.

3. This week has been full of disobedience. I am taking a long, hard look at my heart to fix it at the source. Praying hard that my children will come to know the Lord, and that they will see Him reflected through me! Although, I am nowhere near that - I know He can work miracles!

4. Shawn has been very, abnormally, sweet lately. He's a very kind person in general, and he's the quiet type - you know, just... quiet! (Ummm, verrry different from me!!) He's really stepped out of that and has blessed my heart so much in the past few days :) I love him so much!!!

5. Upon typing the last item, I suddenly heard "sometimes love, it is a river....." as the background music of my mind. Literally, every situation of conversation I'm in (okay, nearly every), I have a corresponding background music song playing in my mind. And sometimes it's funny, so I laugh and look like a moron. Now you are even more convinced of it. :D

6. I've learned this week that using food from the community market - locally grown, organic, etc. - makes me feel more informed on my food choices for the family, tastes better than store bought produce, and directly affects our local economy quicker and more efficiently than shopping at big chain stores. Now, I still do go to chain stores. Some things I need the savings. But for the most part, we are going more local. I love it.

7. I don't have a 7th quick take. Oh wait, I have to clean our bedroom this weekend. In a 14' x 14' room, we have crammed in: a queen size bed, two dressers, a bookcase, a hope chest, a pack 'n play, my wedding dress, too many shoes, and PILES of laundry (because I can't get to any of the dressers to put the darn things away!!). So, we are shoving everything to one side and FINALLY getting that third wall and all of the trim painted. AS OF MONDAY, I WILL NO LONGER HAVE THREE COLORS IN OUR BEDROOM!!! Can you tell that I'm stoked? :D Yay! Now I'm going to put the baby down. For real.

Happy weekend, all!

Yick.

2009-04-03T13:32:00.003-04:00

I love Mondays and Fridays. Mom has been taking the older three in the mornings, to cut me a break to shop, clean, or whatever it is that I need to do on that particular day. Since Shawn worked 2nd shift today, she took them at lunch for the afternoon. I usually have big plans (and get a LOT done!), but I am still feeling, well, icky. I still have a migraine, a tummy ache, and am horribly fatigued. It's amazing what the tiniest bit of gluten will do to me.

So, I'm waiting for Emmie to fall asleep so I can too.

I still can't believe I lived like this for so long. I remember very clearly feeling like this every single day. Thank the Lord, my life isn't like that now. Now, if I can only find enough energy to make it until bedtime...

And still waiting on those tests.

Swelling and hives and gluten, OH MY!

2009-04-02T15:01:00.003-04:00

This was me, yesterday morning, before I called the doc.

The hives aren't totally visible, but you can definitely see the ogre-like swelling on my face. Amazing, huh?! I was so itchy and just... yucky feeling, so I called to get an appointment with the doc.

Well, the swelling and the hives didn't seem to concern her as much as the gluten issue. Benedryl was taking care of the hives and swelling, and it was slowly going down. I had ended up with some GI issues that afternoon, and then I knew I had eat some gluten. Somewhere, somehow, that stuff had gotten into my body.

The only thing I could think that it could have been, is perhaps cross-contamination of the spoons when we ate at my in-laws house on Monday night. They did an excellent job preparing a (mostly) gluten-free meal for me and Lottie. Still, that is the only time I've even been in close proximity to gluten in over a week, and it's been several weeks since I've eaten it.

Today, I'm still a little puffy. Didn't need any Benedryl, but I'm very fatigued, and bordering on migraine. Those symptoms are a dead giveaway. I don't feel quite right, albeit better than yesterday by leaps and bounds!

So she ordered three tests to be run, Vit. D malabsorption (although, the more I hear myself say that, the more wrong it sounds... but I KNOW it was Vit. D something or other), a check for anemia, and SED rate (non-specific, but will indicate a problem if there is one - does celiac count?). I'm not sure if she is checking for further problems, or building to an actual Celiac diagnosis. Either way, she referred to me as having Celiac Disease, and that's what she's assuming me to have - she talked confidently, with no doubts. She was familiar with the symptoms, spotted it right away, and took all of my research (as far as the elimination diet was concerned) into consideration. I like her.

So, waiting to find out on two of the tests today, and the other next week. But being called a Celiac by a doc matters a lot to me. Now I can gain even more knowledge on the subject, and become better equipped to handle it. I refuse to think of myself as deprived. Look at the whole world of cooking that is open to me - and I will be learning as much as I can!

And that was yesterday!

Pics and whatnot

2009-03-31T16:21:00.000-04:00

I am a self-admitted, selfish blogger. Do I blog about the family and post cute pictures? Not often. How about fun outings, family gatherings, and all that? Well, no. So am I the world's most selfish blogger? Probably.

You see, this blog is mine. The kids can have a part in it, but it can't be puked on, pooped on, spilled on, or chewed up. Nor can it be ripped apart. This is my territory. And I love it.

Now, don't get me wrong. I adore my children! I love them with every piece of myself there is to offer. But... it's nice to get away sometimes :)

But today, I just have to post some pictures. I've really slacked in the picture-taking department, so you'll get the best of what I've gotten over the past few weeks. Enjoy!

Read this, too!

2009-03-26T21:18:00.001-04:00

To all of my gluten-free friends, and those who are just curious or have any other type of food intolerance or allergy, CHECK THIS OUT: Gluten-Free Girl by Shauna James Ahern. So much of her story is similar to mine, that I am considering being tested for Celiac. I'm adding her fabulous blog to my favorites, too (there's a icon right up top if you would like to purchase her book). I am halfway through with reading it, and already it is reshaping the way I think about food, and the whole (essentially unamerican) way of thinking about it! I just love the recipes, and encouragement to get out there and experience food in a way that is far better than the instant, just-add-water way of American cooking. Sigh. I love this book.

Oh, and did you see Karina's scrumptious muffins? I WILL be making some this week! They look amazing!!!

Thoughts on being gluten-free...

2009-03-26T20:36:00.000-04:00

As much as it's helped me by leaps and bounds (alleviating ALL gluten, not just most), I still miss bread. You know, the whole process of making it, and then losing yourself in its fresh-from-the-oven goodness. But I also miss Panera, scones, pastries with my coffee, plump muffins and most of all, giant bagels with cream cheese. I was never one to bake a lot of bread (I maybe made an average of 12 loaves per year), but when I did, I relished it. And I miss it.

A sweet neighbor of ours would bring a bag of Panera bread to us every week while Shawn was out of work. Oh, it was so tempting. I gave in more than once, and regretted every bite the following days. But I'm starting to realize that I do have control over food (strange concept, huh?), and there is no reason I can't be happy in the place the Lord has placed me.

And then there's the guilt that comes along with the generosity of others. For example, the sweet ladies of Redeemer have brought us dinner the past few weeks - what a blessing! When I was asked about any food preferences/allergies, I only mentioned Lottie's milk/cheese sensitivity and said nothing about gluten. In my mind I've thought, "How could I? This church has been incredibly generous, how can I give stipulations on our food that are so difficult, even I haven't figured out how to cook well with it yet?!" Fortunately, Shawn and the kids have gobbled up all of the meals that I could not eat. Which is fine, I mean I've been on this diet-thing anyway. But I have a certain amount of guilt about this still. And since that offer for the meals, we've began to notice how severe Lottie's intolerance to dairy is. Even products that contain a trace amount of milk throw her into a tizzy.

And that's not to say the meals haven't helped out. The surely did. I can't begin to describe how difficult it's been to adjust to a fourth child while have a gluten intolerance. Mainly because I have only committed to be TOTALLY gluten free two weeks ago. I would "try" to eat gluten free, but if the food looked amazing, I caved. I felt better than I had, but I wasn't healing. Now, my body is healing and I am able to say no, wherease before I either would not or could not. Talk about being in closet denial. So, I really appreciated the help while I am trying to figure out how to cook these new types of meals and, well, really learn HOW to cook for us. The help in the interim has been just amazing. But I still feel guilty.

All in all (despite the feelings of guilt and mourning the loss of pizza, pasta, and bread), I am thankful for this. I thankful that I have the opportunity to finally know what's good for my body, and to feed myself well. Yeah, yeah. I know that's cheesy. But I do not want to go through the pain and constant illness that I lived in for years, again. Ever. My husband deserves better, and so do my kids. Praise God, we now know.

Modbe

2009-03-26T20:16:00.000-04:00

I have totally fallen in love with with this clothing line. I got my order in the mail today and just LOVE them. One of the things I bought were the yoga capris in the picture. Reversable, AND they have a cute little pocket for an iPod! Love it, love it, love it. Check out the site, and my friend Julie can hook you up.

One more plug for the company: the clothing is modest. Now, seriously, doesn't that make shopping just THAT much better?! It is so hard to find modest clothing these days, and it's a breath of fresh air to see a company that puts emphasis on that, along with being able to, in a sense, buy local at the same time. How awesome is that?

And while you're there, make sure you check out their super cute bathing suits. If I was a swimmer, or dared to take my brood near the water, I would definately pick up one!

On our way to GFCF

2009-03-19T20:33:00.000-04:00

We've been working on altering our foods this week, and I have seen a HUGE improvement thus far! Not only in my own health, but in the health of Calvin and Lottie specifically. Here are some changes we've made to our diet:
- The entire family is on almond milk this week. This will help us detect a milk sensitivity.
- Cheese intake has been limited to the older two, but only in small amounts.
- Lottie and I have been specifically on a gluten and casein free diet (I was curious as to my own potential sensitivity to dairy, and her potential sensitivity to gluten)

And here are the results so far:
- Lottie is sensitive to products that contain even small amounts of milk in their ingredients. For example, we snacked on popcorn the other day, which contained milk (I totally overlooked that one!). With a few minutes and a few of her handfuls of popcorn, she began this 30 minute tantrum that was just horrible. She continued like that the rest of the night. She also began sporting that rash again. Coincidence? I think not.
- I have a sensitivity to dairy, although it's not as bad as Lottie's. Tummy aches, digestive issues, and lethargy are what I get (very similar to what happens when I eat gluten!).
- A few days on a strict diet, and returning to either of these totally wreaks havoc on my system! Sheeeesh. I did cave for some cheese sticks tonight (gluten AND dairy!), and I just know I am going to be up sick tonight! But, it was worth it (I say that now..).
- Calvin is also sensitive to dairy, which really is no surprise since he could only tolerate soy formula as a baby. Within a half hour of eating mac 'n cheese (after a few days of non-dairy), I knew it for sure. At least we know why he has persistent diarrhea now. He also gets very whiny and "my tummy hurts"ish. Poor kid.
- Charity is questionable. She told me two days ago that regular milk hurts her tummy and the almond milk doesn't. I'll need to watch her more carefully.
- Lottie's irritability and mood changes have drastically improved on this new regimen. She's not violent, although still cries a lot (heck, she has 3 teeth partially through her gums right now), but now she only cries when she's in pain. Not all the time. Oh, and she's stopped beating her siblings. And she is very receptive to discipline and is obeying beautifully. This is a marked change in her. I always knew that food issues can cause mood changes, and now I've seen first hand what they can really do.

I am so thankful that headway has been made! Here's to another great day tomorrow, and (hopefully) a night in bed and NOT in the bathroom!

Read This!

2009-03-15T23:14:00.000-04:00

Shawn bought this book for me for my birthday in November, and it has been just fabulous. I am not a religious Factor fan, but I respect him, and believe his perspective on some things are quite on target. This book is a breath of fresh air in this consumerist society, and was a healthy reminder to live real, strong, committed, and within our means! I am finishing it up tonight, and I have thoroughly enjoyed the conversation-like tone in which it was written. How nice it was to take a soak in the tub and just read while Shawn finished classwork! I do believe it will become a new luxury for me. Any suggestions for some good reads next? My theological plate is full right now, and I would love a few good titles to peruse over for my leisurely reading. And I plan to make full use of my library card (although the selection here is truly sad - at least I can attempt!)! If you're interested in Bold Fresh, check out O'Reilly's website . Well, off to catch up on some dishes and laundry, to prepare for tomorrow. I'll be updating the blog on our mission to get Lottie and myself healthy again during the week! Adios!

My (health) story...

2009-03-14T14:24:00.000-04:00

Wow, so much to say on this topic! But I really desire to blog about it, since I was so naive for so
long on what was actually going on with my body. So, here goes.

Ever since I can remember, I have had digestive problems. Looking back, I thought I was normal at the time. I mean, when all you've known is feeling ill after eating, the "ill" feeling doesn't seem so... "ill" anymore, right? It was a feeling I could never pinpoint exactly - just general uneasiness and discomfort. In addition to this, I have always (and I mean always) dealt with chronic migraines, tummy pain, eczema, dermatitis, solar urticaria, anemia, constipation, female problems, sinus infections, TMJ, depression, etc. In high school, my only docs were specialists. I had an Gyn for my female problems (for which I had many ultrasounds, and even a surgery for recurring cysts, possible endometriosis, etc.) - when they were at the end of their rope, I had a laparoscopic surgery to check for endometriosis, during which they took care of a blood clot and did some biopsy of something. All of this pain had no additional source, and I was promptly sent to the GI doc for him to check me out in that respect. I was given some meds, put on a high fiber diet, and that was that. Well, it didn't help. The migraines continued, and although I was eating a little bit better, the most I could chalk everything up to was the preservatives in foods that were causing the tummy aspect of it.

Fast-forward to the last five years. During this time, I have married, and then bore four children in consecutive years. This is when my life and health started to fall apart. Okay, that was overly dramatic. Let's just say things got far worse!

My first pregnancy was great and normal. I gained a whopping 55 pounds (I ate - a lot), and delivered a perfectly health baby girl. That event totally rocked my world. Remember that depression that I mentioned? Well baby blues hailed to full-blown post-partum depression. This depression became the norm in my successive pregnancies and post-pregnancies as well (my big, overly well-kept secret that is now coming out. All those times I said I was fine? Yeahhhh, that was probably false.). With each new baby, the migraines and stomach pain grew worse, the depressive spells more frequent, and on top of it all, I began these horrible back problems that rendered me unable to care for the house, my children, or myself for the last half of my pregnancies. The back pain became so terrible and unbearable, and in addition to all of that, I began to have major bone and muscle pain during my last pregnancy. When it would rain, I would be reduced to a heap of tears due to the TREMENDOUS pain. Every time the kids touched me, it felt like sharp pins. If they grabbed my arm or leg, it felt like knives. The aching was unending. So my OB put me on bedrest for the last several weeks before I delivered. I was miserable, depressed, and begging the Lord help me. Through all of this, He remained faithful. Although I cried constantly, I clung to Him. He was my comfort and my hope that one day it would get better.

So what do I do about all of this? Well, during it all I believed that it was all random.... that I just was sick a lot. But that wasn't satisfying, because it kept me from everything. I was never well, I never felt good, and it dampened friendships and hindered much. How could anyone understand me? I mean, all I did was stay at home. I told myself it was all in my head, I need to buck up and push through it - but all that ever did was make me feel worse. What little energy I had was consumed with the children, leaving NOTHING left over for anyone or anything. Ugh, miserable. And what was even worse, I felt like the most misunderstood person on the face of the earth. You know, the one who has no commitment or backs out of things all the time, or the friend who can never really deliver. Oh, how I cried over these things!

Well, before Emmie was due to be born (while I was on bedrest, and being tested for Lupus), I began to do some research. Research on Lupus, Fibromyalgia, and anything else that could possibly explain what was happening to my body. No matter what I did, it seemed my body always felt worse - I was always MORE sick than I was the year before. Well, a few friends had suggested going gluten free. I did the research, and it seemed like a huge feat. But I was willing to try ANYTHING.... anything to be able to care for my children! Anything to feel GOOD - for just a few days in a row! Anything to not spend the majority of the day on the couch (which is where I had been for the majority of the past 5 years!!!!).

Well, it worked. One day of eating gluten free, and I felt amazing. I didn't feel sick after I ate - and I didn't know how sick I had been feeling after eating until that day!! Migraines? With the exception of hormonal times (ya know) - GONE. TMJ? A thing of the past! PRAISE GOD, He had put a stop to it all!

There are times when I still eat glutenous foods. And during those times, my migraines and TMJ and tummy problems, etc. return fairly quickly. My sinus infections are back to back. I feel HORRIBLE. Anemia - well, I still struggle with it (more so than I did before having children). That is probably my biggest difficulty right now. But praise the Lord, I know what it is! Is it expensive? HECK yeah. But we do what we can, and the Lord provides.

Since all of this (due to my aunt's keen eye as an allergist), we have come to realize that Lottie is very sensitive to either casein or lactose. The poor baby vomits up cow's milk, carries a constant rash, and has persistent diarrhea. Soymilk has solved most of that, but she still carries those symptoms a little, so I think there may be something else she is sensitive to as well... so I will be starting her soon on a GF diet as well. The older two also seem to have some sort of sensitivities as well (although not as pronounced as Lottie's), so our whole family is going GF for awhile, so that we can slowly start to narrow down the food culprits here. Besides, children of a parent who has a gluten sensitivity are much more likely themselves to have the same thing. It definately doesn't hurt to try the elimination diet on them just to make sure. After a few weeks, we'll slowly start to add in foods that we have in question (i.e. eggs, soy, dairy, glutenous grains, etc.). Since it's my job to make sure our kids have the best nutrition available to them, it's incredibly important that I make sure they can tolerate what I am feeding them. I will not rest until I know what is causing these warning signs in them, and take care of it efficiently and effectively.

If you have any interest in researching this topic of celiac disease/gluten intolerance, or any other food intolerance, check out foodintol and Celiac.com . There are a wealth of other resources out there, but these two are great.

Well, off to chat with hubby now... and after that, we have a date! Yay!

A new job!

2009-03-06T17:03:00.000-05:00

That's right - Shawn has landed a job. Praise the Lord! After some serious second thoughts about the military, we just prayed. We prayed for grace and wisdom, and for Divine intervention! Well, the answer came, and Shawn is starting a job at Liberty on Monday. Praise the Lord!! Almost a month without work, and the Lord was faithful to provide every step of the way.

So the Navy is out of the picture now - and we are thankful. The fears that we had are now gone, and we feel confident that this is the path to be taken. Thank you, Lord!

Stroller shopping

2009-03-03T21:56:00.000-05:00

I have a double jogger for sale. You see, I need a tandem. Our double jogger is just too wide to take anywhere, and clumsy at that. And, well, I won't be jogging any time soon with four little ones in tow.

The jogger I am selling looks like this, except it's a double:
Anyway, I have found some cute tandem ones. I am totally in the market for something unique and different, but whoa are they pricey! Here are some of the more interesting ones, my favorite though is the first one! It's a Joovy Big Caboose Stand-on Triple:
This one is also a Joovy, pretty cute as well:
Of course, we could just get one of these:

Ha! What a sight we'd be! Ah well, no solutions tonight. Maybe I'll find a good deal soon on a cute double.

Baby legs... and their alternative

2009-03-02T19:39:00.000-05:00

Baby legs have been big in the cloth diapering world for several years now. Besides being ADORABLE, they are good for diaper changes as well as being warm and totally fashionable. There is a decent sale going on at the Ultimate Baby Boutique - free shipping as well as clearance prices. If you want the look and still find them a bit pricey, try buying a pair of long women's socks at Target or Walmart and snipping the foot part off of them. Depending on the fabric, you may not even need to hem the cuff.

And don't worry, they look super cute on baby boys too! In fact, Calvin had a pair that said "Rock 'n Roll" or "Punk Rock" or something - they were black and totally awesome, I think they even had a skull on them. And I made them from snipped-off female socks found at Target!

I love it - sweet fashion in a frugal way.

CVS Sunday

2009-03-01T15:31:00.001-05:00

Today I purchase all of this for a grand total of $7.58! That's cheaper that one pack of Pull-ups on sale!

For those of you that shop at CVS, I did this by starting out with $16 in ECB and a few coupons. I made three transactions and rolled over the ECBs from each transaction.

1st Transaction:
2 Packs of Pull-ups
1 Pkg Always
1 Gillette Fusion Razor
Total: $3.49 after Coupons, ECB's

2nd Transaction (using $8 ECB's from 1st Transaction):
5 Cover Girl Eyeshadows
Total: $3.87 after Coupons, ECB's

3rd Transaction (using $5 ECB's from 2nd Transaction):
1 Bottle of Dawn
1 Box of Bounce
1 Pkg gum
Total: $.22 after Coupons, ECB's)

For more information on how all of this works, check out Money Saving Mom for her CVS tutorial and great tips on saving money and using coupons.

Disney store

2009-02-28T23:24:00.001-05:00

If you've been reading my blog (or know anything about me), you know how I dislike character anything. I have a caveat or two in regards to this, for example: 1. tastefully made items, or 2. tastefully made and from the Disney store items. There are a few shows that my children adore, and so if I can combine their delight with my two caveats, I am a happy camper.

So recently I have been in search of spring play clothes for the kids. Being play clothes, these need to be items that I can let go of easily if they become tattered, ripped, puked on, etc. So I met my match here, and I've got to say, I may actually be sad if some of these do get ruined in the course of play!

This cute robe was on sale for $10.99, so of course I picked up one for Charity, Cal, and Lot. Of course, Cal's is red. Sooo cute!

This was also super cute, for $4.99! I picked it up right away for Calvin.

I also bought this dress for all three of my little girls - $4.99 EACH!

I also picked up this super cute pajama set for Lottie, for $2.99!!!!!

And that's just a few of the great deals I picked up. The kids are going to be so thrilled when we get this in the mail! I can't wait to see their faces!

If you haven't yet, make sure you check out the Steals and Deals blog. Truly some fabulous tip-offs for great deals online.

Military update

2009-02-26T18:41:00.000-05:00

Funny thing is, shortly after I posted the last blog, the National Guard/Army opportunity totally fell through. Well, it didn't fall through per say, there is just no way it could possibly work for us. We took that as the Lord's direction, and shortly after that, we found out that the Navy is really panning out.

Shawn will be going to Richmond on Wednesday to take a test for the Baccalaureate Degree Completion Program (BDCP). If he passes, then his test and paperwork go before a panel to determine if he is indeed accepted into this program. We could know something as soon as mid-March!

If he is accepted, then he is able to SKIP basic and begin getting a paycheck from the Navy while he finishes school. When he finishes school, he heads to OCS (Officer Candidacy School) for 3 months. We would be stationed after that. Talk about awesome.

The other thing we learned today is that his time at home will equal his time deployed. So, if he is deployed for 6 months, when he gets back he will be on base for 6 months.

So, a lot of good news today! We are still praying for the Lord's will, whatever that may be. But we sure do want that test to go well!

Which one?

2009-02-26T13:10:00.000-05:00

We are back at this again! Shawn is trying to make the best decision for our family, and quite honestly, there are benefits in both.

The Navy is very prestigious (and awesome uniforms!!), the careers are just fascinating, and the deployments seem to be shorter than the Army. And there's no way we would be back here with family until after he left the military.

On the other hand, Shawn can do a program through the National Guard called Active First, where you enlist into the full-time Army for 2 1/2 to (I think) 4 years, a hefty enlistment bonus, and then another sizable bonus if he returns to the National Guard after the Army time is up. Not to mention, we would be able to move back here if we wanted to. However, the Army's deployments are longer, and we could really be stationed anywhere in the next few years, but he would not have ship rotations like he would in the Navy.

There are possibilities within each branch to finish his last three classes at home, after basic, before Officer's School, or AIT, which we are still finding out info on. That means no deployment until school is done.

I am so glad, though, that this is not a decision he is making with his hands tied, so to speak. He has thought about the military since 9/11, even though he was only 16 at the time. When you mix that with a bad economy and few jobs, the answer is obvious. And I couldn't be more proud!

So here we are again, and we'll just keep praying until we know for sure one way or the other. But we are confident either way, that if the Lord does not want this for us, it will not happen. All that we desire is that the Lord is glorified in this decision, and we are praying to that end! Please pray with us for that!

For my female friends...

2009-02-25T16:40:00.000-05:00

I am fairly confident that the only people who check my blog are womenfolk. So let me recommend this and this for your consideration (two of my favorites, although the names do make me chuckle!). Trust me on this, it is worth the research and thought.

But then again, I love cloth diapers, and am very interested in all things that produce less waste and more money.

(Any additional green ideas? I'd love to hear them. Currently I am contemplating how to effectively grow an organic vegetable crop this year, getting rid of my harsh cleaners (except for bleach), returning (once again) to cloth diapers, and composting. Seriously, the amount of trash we put out on a weekly basis is just disgusting.)

So the disclaimer is this. If you do research it, as with anything, there are a lot of strong opinions on both sides. You know, those ones that will say it's detrimental to your health to do otherwise, or you are not clean if you go the other way. My opinion is this: as with everything, do your own research, act deliberately, and don't just "do" because something is conventional, or unconventional at that.

So at the risk of weirding everyone out, I will now rest my case :)

Check this out...

2009-02-24T16:25:00.000-05:00

I'm sure everyone in the world has seen this video, but Shawn and I STILL cannot get enough of it!!!

GRE Update

2009-02-21T11:40:00.000-05:00

Since my last post on my last Getting Rid of Excess campaign, I've lost 3 more pounds! This puts me way ahead of the .8 lb per week goal. Yay! This brings my total weight loss down to 36 lbs lost, 42 to go!

Now I'm going to find a sweet ticker to add, to keep me all motivated and all. In th words of my sweet little boy, "Peace".

Caterpillar Bedding

2009-02-21T00:24:00.001-05:00

I found this awesome bedding set at a fabulous website, so I picked two up right away. Fortunately, I had a little stash saved up to buffer the cost. Either way, $40 is not bad for a bedding set. Normally, I dislike character ANYTHING. It's cheap, bad quality, breaks easily, etc. Plus I just don't like primary colors. But compromise here - I LOVE the Hungry Caterpillar, and so do the children. I will be glad to not have a bunch of random blankets on the beds and a sheet dilemma every time someone wets the bed!!

But let me just make a confession on this. I have been putting off buying bedding for the children for forever. Why? I am really bad at decorating. I love a tastefully decorated room! But I am really poor at it. But, I am determined to learn. One room at a time!

Getting Rid of Excess - again

2009-02-16T12:48:00.001-05:00

The farther removed from Emmie's birth we get, the more my house seems to be decluttering itself. In fact, over the past few weeks, it has become habit to mentally go through the "keep, donate, or toss" mantra every time I straighten up. The last biggest thing? Losing that baby weight. Oh, how it has been plaguing me! This weight seems to want to cling to me forever, and although that sort of affection would flatter me from ANYTHING else in the world, it's becoming annoying and frustrating. So here's the deal. I have a workout video. And the ability to go running in the mornings. I currently need to loose 45 pounds to get to where I want to be. And I know I can do this. I would love to have this weight shed by the time Emmie turns 1, which would mean I have roughly 37 weeks until my goal date. So, that would mean .8 lbs per week, and 1 1/2 lbs by March 1st. This seems so incredibly daunting! But.... (deep breath).... definitely possible. So let's do it!

J. Crew Sale

2009-02-15T21:36:00.000-05:00

This is the J. Crew Long Rivington boot. Italian leather, 2 1/2 in. stacked kitten heel. Retail price? A cool $228.00. Purchase price? $60. For two pairs.

This is the British Millerain oilcloth anchor peacoat. Retail price? $250. Purchase price? $20.

That was only three of our purchases! I am hooked. So next time that sale rolls around, we will be there, and there for much longer than this go round. Yay for sales!

Yeeeeah, remember that routine?

2009-02-15T21:29:00.000-05:00

Emmie's look captures it! As of lately, it's been like, "What routine?" However, that routine was, IS, a fabulous guide for us! I love it. I do. But then we got sick last week with a tummy bug. Oddly enough, the day Shawn got the news about the layoff was the day it really hit. So needless to say, we have not followed it since! BUT, I am thrilled to get back to the fun on Tuesday (Mom takes the older 3 on Mondays and Fridays until lunchtime!). Yay for order and less chaos! I'm telling you, I was a new woman once this house had been sanitized and cleaned. So we'll see how it goes this week!

CVS, I love thee...

2009-02-15T21:18:00.000-05:00

Perhaps I take too much joy in my trips to CVS. But I just cannot help it. The above products totaled just over $53, and I shelled $17something out of pocket after my coupons and extra bucks. PLUS I got $14 in extra bucks back on my receipt. I truly cannot get enough of this!

Tomorrow I will be going to Kroger to pick up a few deals there (Lord willing). Sundays are just so great though - church, family, and CVS. I love it!!

So long, 84...

2009-02-15T21:03:00.000-05:00

Well, it happened. Shawn's work was shut down last Monday, and he's officially jobless. It sounds worse than it actually feels, and the Lord chose the best possible time for this all to happen. Shawn is doing well, and is content with what we have been handed. Even though this is the second layoff in a year and a half, this one was by far the easiest. So friends, please pray for us - that we will trust the Lord's goodness and provision. We need our faith to be sustained throughout the duration of this! But as my dear friend told me on Monday, the Lord is just as sovereign now as he was the day before we got the news. Shawn has it down, also - "The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord!". We are in the Lord's school - I can only pray that we will learn whatever He is teaching us well, and for His glory!

Routine love

2009-01-29T10:49:00.001-05:00

So far so good here. I'm doing my best to stick with it, and use it as a guide and not law. I tend to be not only an idealist, but legalistic as well. So far so good!

I've actually been able to complete some paperwork as well. Paperwork falls through the cracks here all the time. I hate paperwork. But nearly done, just need Shawn to sign some things and put it in the mail, and success!

Tomorrow I am returning to the GRE plan - 30 days and I'm sure there will be a significant difference in our house. I already see it. Signing off for now. Back to the normal tedium of my life :)

A Routine - IN WRITING!!!

2009-01-28T11:22:00.000-05:00

Okay. This is it. In writing!

So I don't know if this routine will be definitive. I will most assuredly need a few days to work with it and see if it is servicable for our family. It LOOKS good, and BUSY, but we'll see how it works. I am going crazy without order around here.

Our "normal" routine for days at home:

8am - Wake 'em up and get 'em to the breakfast table

830 - Dress/teeth/hair

9 -Free time

930 - Alone time (including Pack 'n Play time for Lottie! Mom, aren't you proud!!)

10 - Imagination Movers (a great show!)

1030 - Room time together (this is where they are now)

11:30 - Book time

12 - Lunch

1230 - Nap prep

1 - Nap

3 - Up from naps/snack/craft time/outside IF it's nice

430 - Bath time

5 - Alone time

530 - Word Girl

6 - Blanket time

630 - Daddy home/dinner

7 - Bedtime prep

730 or 8 - Bed time

Whew! Hopefully it will keep them active enough to rest well during naps and at night. We'll see how this goes. Ready, set, DEEP BREATH... and we're off to book time...

Day 5 - A ROUTINE!

2009-01-27T15:15:00.000-05:00

It has taken me a few days to get back to my posts. I was sick yesterday, with a mild case of the flu. The kids have had colds, and last night two of them began this whole stomach bug mess. And it's finally getting back to normal. But I am so fatigued right now. Not just tired, fatigued.

Emmie will be 3 months old on the 11th of February. I feel as if I am finally ready to start THINKING about a routine. Naptimes have been torture since her birth, and even though they have gotten better in the past month, my children really need more activity to get sufficiently tired by naptime and bedtime. Lottie is still waking up at night (even though Emmie is not!), and she really needs to cry it out. This is next to impossible when she's in room with Charity and Calvin. The other night, Calvin asked to not be in his room anymore during one of Lottie's tyrades. It broke my heart.

Fortunately, we are slowly but surely making progress on the sunroom project (it will be our bedroom when all is said and done). Nights are torture right now - for us and the kids - so I am praying it can be completed soon!

Anyway, today's GRE task is to assess the needs of my children, and make a list of non-negotiables for our routine/schedule. My wonderful mother has agreed to start taking Charity, Calvin, and Lottie on Monday and Friday mornings for me - there's a starting point. I hope to get somewhere on this today. I still haven't cleaned out the fridge from the other day's task. Okay, off to get my cranky children up from nap. We're falling apart quick here. Sheesh.

Day 4 - Food control part 2

2009-01-24T06:16:00.000-05:00

Ugh. I did it AGAIN. I left Shawn and I's salvageable dinner out all night. And I am kicking myself.

So on that note - one of today's goal is to salvage every bit of food and formula that is economically useful. And clean out the fridge, if I get to it (but I never seem to). Yesterday seemed to be unseasonably productive for me. By the Lord's grace, I had the strength to wash 4 loads (yay!), fix a decent dinner, clean out the bottle cabinet, get the rest of the Sam's items put away, pack up some outgrown kids' clothing, etc.

In order to avoid over-doing it today, I'm going to just try to accomplish three things:

1. Be USEFUL and not WASTEFUL with our God-given provision

2. Clean out the fridge

3. Divide the 6 lbs. of hamburger meat in the fridge into 1 lb. sections, freeze individually

And once again, I am constrained to rely on the Lord's grace to accomplish even these small things. Only He can help me change these bad habits towards His glory.

Getting Rid of Excess

2009-01-24T06:11:00.000-05:00

I realized, in reading back over my postings, that I never thoroughly explained what exactly I'm doing with these daily tasks. So like me for my mind to fly 100 mph. So here's the point:

We've accumulated a bunch of junk. We need to get rid of it.

We've turned into wasteful, consumer-Americans. Let's make full use of what we have.

We've got the capability to bless other individuals, less fortunate than us. Let's do it.

We are wasting money/time/space/energy because of all the extras. Let's become more efficient.

So this is the Getting Rid of Excess project (hereafter GRE). With the Lord's help, I can daily tackle one task towards this goal!

Day 3 - Food control

2009-01-23T09:02:00.000-05:00

We must be the world's worst food wasters. So today - I am devising a plan to: take down our budget, make sure we are always stocked with some food to eat, and ensure that we are not wasteful with our food/food storage, and anything else I can do to conserve in any way.

Last night, we were able to go to Sam's and procure a month's worth of groceries (maybe longer!) for $300. This included some necessary items, such as laundry detergent, paper towels, toilet paper, freezer bags, etc. These things may not need to be bought in bulk every time, as I'm generally able to get them for super cheap at CVS. However, this month we needed to do so.

So for things like meat, breakfast foods, pasta, etc. it is definitely more beneficial for me to get them at Sam's right now. Feeding a family of 6 is no small task, albeit much credit to the women with larger families. But for me, it's new terrain and a learning experience - and I'm realizing that at certain times, convenience takes the cake over good deals. But only sometimes!

CVS will be revisited this week. Tomorrow I have the awesome task of getting rid of excess paper by culling coupons and clipping ones from the past few weeks' paper. Can't you see my excitement? No? Ah, well - don't be envious. It's not exactly easy to do with my older three trying to get into it all! But all in name of getting RID of clutter and EMBRACING organization!

So to break it down, today's to-do list is as follows {GRE items in bold}:

Brush kids' hair/teeth
Finish getting myself ready for the day!
Finish putting away yesterday's purchases
Clean out fridge, wash gross dishes
Attach list to ref. door denoting what leftovers are inside and in what container
Clean out the three shelves that are chaos, toss old/non-useful bottles
Plan out this weeks/next weeks' meals
Sweep/mop floor
Wipe down cabinets
Wash at least 4 loads
Clean the bathroom (if there's time)
Make dinner
Keep up with discipline
Finish up a custom order for tomorrow
Take an hour at 10:30, 1:30, 4:30, 7:30, 9 to feed baby

And that is my day. And I am already exhausted, but praying for the Lord's grace. And I know He'll give it.

Getting rid of excess - Day 2

2009-01-22T22:39:00.000-05:00

Okay for Day 2, my goal was to actually UNLOAD some of the items we are selling on Craigslist. Mission accomplished! We sold three items today - our microwave (fortunately we have an extra one in the basement!), our loveseat, and a glider/footstool set. YAY! So an exta amount of cash from just a small amount of effort.

Getting rid of excess - Day 1

2009-01-21T07:30:00.000-05:00

I will be blogging for the next little while on this topic that has been on my mind for a few weeks now. Excess. So hang in there. I HOPE to have a new task to tackle every day in order to cut down excess and to get out of this consumer mindset that IS America.

Today's task? Managing and keeping record of the items we are selling on Craigslist. In that same line, scouting out any additional items that can be sold. So far, we have listed Shawn's car, a large appliance, a small appliance, one of our guitars, a pack 'n play, and several additional items.

My hope is to become a faithful steward all the way down to the smallest cent. All of this is attempting to be done with the glory of God on the brain, in the heart, and on our lips.

Flowers!

2009-01-20T17:26:00.000-05:00

My husband is so sweet. After getting up at a little after 4 a.m. to go grocery shopping, he brought these home. Initially, they were four small arrangements, that I combined to make one larger and smaller grouping. Anyway, he left a note in front of them on the counter that reads:

"Good Morning Ladies!
I just wanted you all to know how much I love you all!
Meg, your tulips are the red ones because you ARE my Love!
Charity, yours are the yellow ones, because you are my little Sunshine.
Lottie, yours are the dark pink ones because you are so warm & cuddly!
And lastly Emmie, yours are the lite pink becuase you're such a cute baby girl!
I love you!!!
Daddy"

:)

Inauguration 2009

2009-01-20T10:23:00.000-05:00

This is such an exciting day for our country. Not because I'm one of the those "Yes, we can!"ers, or an Obamanite. It's because our experiment of a country is working yet again. The people have spoken! This is who America has chosen to be their next President.

I most assuredly don't agree with most of his policies. However, as a follower of Christ, I will joyfully respect his position as President. It saddens me to see the masses of Christians who take their Constitutional rights more seriously and "religiously" than they do their Christian responsibilities. Example being the freedom of speech, and the ability to dissent against government - e.g. the Nobama slogan that has been going around. Instead of reviling against our God-given and constituent-chosen authority, shouldn't we be praying for him and hoping for him to succeed in office? As opposed to the inevitable "I told you so!" attitude, just waiting for his first slip-up. And on an additional note, how does this influence non-believers towards salvation? Seeing the bitter, sore-loser attitude of the current Evangelicals will just further push their hardened hearts away from the Gospel. Not good.

So if I did not have three children climbing all over me, I am sure I would be spouting off a plethora of Scripture verses proving my point more. However, I am only half here right now, and will bounce this discussion right over to Girltalk, where there is an excellent post on praying for our new President. May God bless him, and of course, America as well.

The winner (revised)

2009-01-19T07:35:00.001-05:00

I have been corrected. My mother was actually the first to post the answer to the "Which one" post. So, congrats mom!

Surprise date!

2009-01-19T07:22:00.000-05:00

While I absolutely love my job, I completely get burnt out sometimes. I know I'm at that point, or close to it, when everything makes me cry. I mean everything. I suppose I am just emotional like that.

Shawn seems to handle it well. It seems to not phase him much. He's good to let me cry on his shoulder, or say some cheesy thing to get me laughing. Or give me this dopey face he learned at his work. I'll have to post a pic of it sometime.

But on Saturday, he planned for a date night for us. You see, surprises are not common with Shawn - that's okay, because with four little ones, I'm not too fond of them either right now. But I NEEDED this! He secured babysitting (via his parents), and we ran two quick errands and ended up at the Good Cherry - a new coffee spot. The atmosphere was fabulous, and their espresso cups were so cute, I almost bought some (except that we don't have an espresso machine). For a Saturday, there was hardly anyone there. So we goofed off and hand a great time! I also was able to roll yarn. (I really don't go anywhere without it.)

I love him :)

And the winner is....

2009-01-16T17:45:00.000-05:00

Shawn (via wall post on Facebook). But I suppose he'll have to share that title with everyone else, since EVERYONE else got it too! Except for Philip, but that's okay Philip. Don't beat yourself up too badly there, bro.

So to my family, I fear that I have underestimated your attention to the various details during the infancy of my children. Or, at least, your attention to the particular rug I have in my living room.

And the answer? Why, that picture is of Lotness.

Sweet, sweet baby girl! But which one?

2009-01-15T13:12:00.001-05:00

Guess which Morrison girl this is?

Homemaker in training

2009-01-13T10:09:00.001-05:00

I find it much more time-efficient for me to snap pictures with my Blackberry, and blog with those. Our SLR is just fabulous, but a bit bulky, and just a magnet for tiny hands when it's out. So for now, I will enjoy the benefits of our Blackberry, and being able to email the photos to myself to post.

So today I figured it was high time for me to pull out my apron again. I have much to do today (of course, blogging is NOT one of the priorities!), so it has come in useful already. I have managed to prevent peed on and spitted-up on clothing so far, therefore proving its worth to me already.

Charity, seeing my apron, declared that she was in need of one as well. And (thanks to Aunt Heather and her AWESOME gift ideas!), I produced from our dishcloth drawer her new favorite item. I don't know if she is so delighted over hers because of my apparent joy in mine, but that is irrelevant. This chick has her head square on her shoulders!

"So," you may think, "will she ACTUALLY make this child WORK?" Well.... YES! But thanks be to God, I have the sweetest, funnest, and most interesting (and IMPORTANT!) job. I have the awesome privilege of teaching her how to care for a family! And her sweet heart and gentle nature is teaching me how to do my job better and love it even more. And people, that's only one aspect of everything I get to do as a wife/mom/homemaker.

So in the spirit of teaching my sweet children, I will be utilizing Charity's help in sorting laundry (she rocks the laundry!), and if they will suppress their fear of the basement, I'll get them to help me load the dryer with wet clothes, throw more laundry into the wash, and fold burp cloths. And maybe wipe of the table and use their little hand brooms to sweep up the kitchen and dining room floors. We have so much fun doing these things together (it IS possible!!), and they learn so much in the process.

Okay I really have to get back to work now! Praise the Lord for little souls to train for Him!

Ahh... sweet organization!

2009-01-09T11:12:00.001-05:00

Three kids in one (small) bedroom - at last! This totally made my day. All in a morning's work...

Bedtime clocks

2009-01-08T10:23:00.000-05:00

Well, due to some obedience issues, we are instituting some additional methods to help curb this trend in our 2 1/2 year old. Anyone who knows Calvin, knows this kid has buns of steel. It seems he does not care about spankings. And I thought Charity was stubborn.

So this is how it works: At the beginning of the day, the clock starts out at 8:00. Every time we have a discipline issue, in addition to the spank, the big hand on the clock is moved back 5 min. I have yet to see if it will be effective, but I am hopeful!

It's obvious which clock belongs to Calvin - and since the picture was taken, it's been moved back further. Now, if we can just get him to stay in bed during naps and at night, we'll be in good shape. I have an idea I'm working on, but that will require some supplies at the store. I'll secure those this afternoon.

So I suppose it's back to the grind now. Tons of laundry, tons of cleaning, and family coming over tonight. It will most definitely be a busy day. My Grandmother is still heavily on my mind, and I'm praying that I can keep my mind from becoming too engrossed in my daily activities that I fail to keep eternity in perspective.

Pain and joy

2009-01-07T22:16:00.000-05:00

On January 2nd, 2009, my Grandmother, May Vain, saw her Savior. Our Savior.

We got the phone call at 12:30 am, New Years Day, that she had first fell into respiratory arrest, followed shortly thereafter by cardiac arrest. She was due to leave the hospital in just a matter of days.

So we packed - very quickly - after just a few hours of rest. She was on a ventilator. Somewhat responsive. But shouldn't have been. She was a DNR, and due to some mix up at the hospital, they resucitated anyway. They were going to keep her on the ventilator until all of the family could get there.

We arrived at the hospital at 8:30ish that night. I got to speak to her, and my mouth said things that should have been told to her during all of the years I was able to enjoy her here. I told her how I looked up to her. That she was meeting the One that saved her - and how incredibly jealous I am of her. I told her how her character has influenced me. How her devotion to her family and love for her husband was not only a inspiration, but daily on my mind. I told her how much I love her and respect her. I stroked her hands, her hair, kissed her face. When I told her how she has influenced me, her eyebrows moved up and down expressively and she struggled to speak, although the ventilator prevented it. She tried to open her eyes and couldn't. I knew that she was protesting - she was always so humble and opposed any flattering of herself. I stayed as long as I could - as long as the kids could take it. Shawn, Emily, and I sang to her with weak voices. We brought Charity in, and she was able to hear that sweet voice that I hear every single day. How sweet it must have sounded to her. We went home, and tried to rest.

The next day, Friday, my aunt took Emily and I aside and explained that her, my dad, and Uncle Cliff were in agreement that ventilator indeed was against her wishes (she was so angry that it was there, that in her struggles had disconnected it several times already - thus was heavily sedated) and that it was time to remove her. So at two, Emily and I made the trip to the hospital. We went in one last time, and I attempted yet again to tell her how much I love her, and how full my heart was for her - with joy and pain all at once. This was what she had waited her life for - the completion of her sanctification, the hope that she held for so many years. So I stroked her hair, kissed her, held her hand, as long as I could. My Aunt explained to her what was going to happen, and told her mom that she loved her. Once again, my grandmother tried so hard to speak. I know she was saying, "I love you, too." She just wanted to go home, to heaven, as she had told her sister not even two days prior.

Some time during the four o'clock hour, I don't quite remember the time exactly, the ventilator was removed. She breathed on her own for nearly 6 hours after that. During that time we were in and out, securing a baby sitter, getting the kids to bed, etc. We made it back to the hospital around 9:30ish. When we were there, we were able to sing to her again... and one of the gentleman there (the music leader of her church) sang the song my grandmother would sing to me when I was little - You Are My Sunshine. I cried more than I ever thought possible. Around 10:10, the nurse came into the waiting room and notified us that we needed to come back. When we arrived, we witnessed the last few minutes of her life on earth. She comfortably left her earthly body, to meet her Lord face to face. The room was full of family, yet peaceful. I had witnessed eternity right there - the hope of my soul and everything I am living for now. What a joyful occasion! What heart wrenching sorrow! And I would be remiss to act as if there were no regrets. But I was there - I saw her in the moment before she met God.

And I can't help but wonder if the Lord was wooing her away. Did she get a sweeter taste of heaven as the moments and hours dawned closer to her departure? Did the music of heaven get louder and more clear? Did the sweet aroma of hope fulfilled become stronger and stronger? And did her Savior's face become clearer the closer she got? I suppose I will not know until I am there myself. But my hands are shaking at the thought! Could it be that she knew it was imminent - that her sanctification was rapidly approaching its end? How sweet those last few days must have been to her! The thoughts and longings of her heart must have been beautfully sweet and joyous.

Her funeral was held on Tuesday at 11 am. Shawn was asked to be a pallbearer, and he humbly and gladly accepted. Needless to say, it was difficult to care for my children without him. My sister was a tremendous help to me the entire time. It was quite surreal though. My heart wanted to grieve, yet my hands were so busy. The graveside was no different. The day was nasty and rainy and cold, and there were chairs set up for family under then tent - yet my sweet Calvin was absolutely terrified to be under the tent. He and Lottie cried for a lot of it - they were tired and hungry and cold. So only tonight, in typing out my thoughts, has the grief finally started to hit me. I miss her. I will see her again, but more importantly I, too, will meet my Savior one day. And her passing has made me crave it even more. I pray that the things I have learned on the brevity of life and the joys to come will not leave me quickly. While she was dying, and since then, the verse that has been burned into my heart is this:

2 Corinthians 4:17 For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison,

She probably feels already as if she has been with the Lord for an eternity, with all but an eternity ahead of her. Praise be to God, I can only stand in awe of His works. His ways are above mine, and I am thankful that He has taken her home, where she will suffer no more and is relishing in the presence of Him who created her, redeemed her, and completely sanctified her. Praise be to God.

Our new home..

2008-12-27T11:59:00.001-05:00

Well, in the blogworld anyway. I need a blog that I love, not one that I dislike. And the wordpress blog was just not happenin' for me. It was so... blah. And condensing my blogs to one place is just easier. Perhaps I can remember to keep this thing up now!

More later. Between a crying baby and the someone else roaming the house with a stinky diaper, I am definately needed elsewhere at the moment!